Details: Gotta blame it on something, might as well blame it on the intern, Ray. Specifically, the wonkiness in the e-mail last week. Came to us from one of those work-study programs the local college does. It's our fault, really. Shouldn't have told him about the pens-by-the-pound and parking meters without the requisite rubber chicken and Hungarian helmet equipped for safety. He charged off into the warehouse and headed straight to the Bargain Maker 9000, which helps us create our e-mails. We'll spare you the grisly details, but our email and our intern weren't the same after. Exposure to high concentrations of bargains and incredible stuff can affect a person. Poor Ray. He'll never pay retail prices again. We're sorry for any adverse side-effects you may have experienced while we patched up the e-mail (and walls). Please use on your shopping cart for 11.575% off your order in his memory because that was his favorite number and he would have wanted you to get a discount. Apply it to anything you like, sale items included. Valid through midnight Wednesday, 4/18/2018.
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